Our Eulogy for Spud

THANKS

Before I begin and on behalf of the family, I would like to mention a number of people.  We would like to thank each and every one of you who have taken the time to be here today, for making the time, taking it off work and in some cases travelling a fair distance to pay your last respects to our beloved father.  We would also like to express our sincerest gratitude to each of you who did not know Dad and are here as friends for Niki, Ruth, Keith or I.  

I thank each of you who prayed and provided words of encouragement, love and concern for us during the past two weeks while Dad was in hospital.  Your voices did not fall on deaf ears and we were boulstered by the number of people who were supporting us and Dad during this time.   

Specially I thank the Lombard family, the Bitters, the Balitho's, the McLachlans and the other members of Mom and Dad's home cell who graciously and unthinkingly arrived whenever Ruth or I believed that Mom needed the support of her friends.  Thank you to Keith’s, Ruth’s and my friends who supported us, gave up their prayers, lovingly offered any manner of assistance and support. I thank my dear friend Vanessa for all her support and daily telephone calls – you have, unconsciously, been an invaluable support to me during this time – thank you.  Mom and I also wish to thank Zanele, Kate and Melvin from the office for their daily support to see how things were going  and asking after Dad’s condition and progress - you have been, without thinking, a wonderful support to us during this time. Ruth and I thank you one and all for all that you have done in the past fortnight for us, for Mom and for Dad. 

I thank, with all my love, my aunts Shirley and Loney, Vaughan, Richard, Mandy and Maggie for being there every step of the way and lovingly looking out for us as a family, always willing to help, assist, support, listen, care and love.  Thank you for taking so much time to come to Olivedale everyday to be there with us, hold hands and provided that much needed, yet unspoken, support.   We love you all, as Dad loved you all, and we thank God for the wonderful family which we have.  To family far and wide who are not here today, Stephen and David, David and Hugo, thank you for your support and loving telephone calls.  To Dad’s good friend, Brian Brown, Mom truly appreciated your daily calls, love and concern. 

Lastly, the family wishes to thank our long-standing friend, Joseph, for providing the refreshments which we will all enjoy after today’s service.  Dad loved dining at The Sheikh’s Palace and was looking forward to visiting once he got out of hospital.

 

TRIBUTE

As many of you know, Dad really enjoyed giving impromptu speeches.  He was a great off-the-cuff man who managed to say all the right things and not drag on too long.  Some of you who are present may remember my 21st birthday, where spoke for almost 20 minutes, much to my embarrassment and the fascination of my friends at the life I had lead.  Our tribute may not be as long, may not mention all which others wish we would say, but it will highlight the wonderful husband and father which David Charles Garratt was.  This is a tribute by Mom, Ruth, Keith and I. 

Davey Gee, Dave, Poppet, Mr Gee and Spud were some of the names by which we called Dad.  One of the earliest memories you have of your parents is a physical presence. Holding onto dad's little finger when I was very young, because his hands were too big to grasp, came back to me last week when I held his hand in the hospital. He had incredibly large hands. I know his voice was distinctive too – many people commented on it. He always had a strong, athletic body which he was lucky enough to retain from his teenage years, despite three or four decades of 'good living'. Dad loved music, good food, good wine, and a nice cigar every now and then. He uncle Hans partook of the 'osbloed' (that's red wine) and he was an adventurous eater – suffering from an awful case of food poisoning once when he decided to try wild boar at the airport Holiday Inn. I suppose reading Asterix & Obelix had made him curious. It's thanks to Dad that Ruth and I tried all sorts of weird and wonderful cuisine yet some of it was just too rich for me. 

He loved computers and embraced their technological revolution with fervour. He was always keen to know more about how to make this work smarter, or what software to use to do that. We spent hours together as a family with our Radio Shack, programming games, and then in later years, learning the in-s and out-s of DOS, Lotus 123, and then the design programs that he used for work at Anglo. Most boys are gadget fiends and Dad was no different. He had a fabulous HP calculator that we could play star wars on, with a small attachable printer. Of course, these days it's expanded to a study full of computer bits – a continuous feed large format printer, all sorts of external drives, microphones, printers and whatnot. He was an avid learner, always reading about some or other technological advance. 

Dad enjoyed fantasy and science-fiction.  Star Wars, episodes 4,5,6 were really incredible to him until episodes 1,2 & 3 with modern computer graphics overtook them.  He even found Matrix and Lord of the Rings to be spectacular cinematographical feats however he still loved the golden oldies like BattleStar Gallactica and Robotec. 

Dad enjoyed reading all manner of books but managed to lead Ruth and I down the life-long path of fantasy novels by David Eddings, Raymond E Feist and many others.  When we first discovered David Eddings, late in March on year, we bought the entire series, as it was then, and the three of us read all five books in tandem, back to back.  We even went so far as to have pre-ordered the next books in the series from Books Unlimited in Emmarentia. 

He enjoyed wild-life, bird watching and the outdoors and when we were younger he would take Ruth and I walking through the veld which lay above our house.  Mom and Dad would take any opportunity to go away to the game reserve or another nature reserve to show us the beauty of the fauna and flora of our country.

Although he didn't come swanning out of University with a degree, he did start out at Wits studying geology, then drafting at Anglo, and then onto managing various departments within Mechanical Engineering and Technical Services. He travelled abroad to the UK, Brazil and Israel, which gave him a perspective on the global community. He would sometimes say things to me about the condition of the world – words which rang true with the experiences that we've had abroad. I guess that means he was worldy-wise, and understood the human condition in all it's permutations.  He once recalled to me a day-trip he took through a part of Israel where the remaining mechanized cavalry vehicles lie at the road-side, now all rusted and eroded.  He said that the image would stay with him for the rest of his life as a reminder of the futility of human conflict – not even an armoured vehicle is enough protection. 

He loved to create and was very imaginative, a wonderful art which Ruth fully inherited.  Dad could create any manner of things out of wood.  He built the lounge suite, his and mom’s bed, Ruth and my bed, the staircase railing and the library.  Akin to his draughtmanship, I think the precision and sense of achievement was what inspired him most and abiltity to create that which was unique to him was the reward.  While it took him 31 years to finally show me how to turn wood, I am so thankful for those two days where he did.  Whenever he came out of the workshop covered in sawdust from head to foot it would remind me of when we were children – sawdust and tobacco – a mixture of scents which I will miss. 

Dad was a man of few words - rather a 'do what I do' attitude, he led by example. He was very even tempered and was never one to play emotional games with people. You knew that when he said something he was being straightforward with you. When he disciplined Ruth and I it was always with a frank attitude : 'you have done something wrong, and these are the consequences of your actions.' We didn't feel unjustly treated. 

I know we were in fact his second set of children and lucky to have benefited from his experience of being a surrogate father to his sister Shirl and his brother, Ken.  While I will not do her memory justice, I know Shirl would want me to tell you that he was the bestest brother in the whole world and even more than that to her, that she loved him dearly and will miss him forever. 

Dad knew the meaning of honour, dignity, loyalty and discretion. He got frustrated as so many of us do, with pompous verbosity and other people's shortcomings, but he always kept his own counsel and never spoke ill of others. Having been around for a good thirty years now, I can see what a rare discipline this is. He never laid much store by other people's judgment of him, or his family, and stood tall amongst men. This self confidence is one of the greatest gifts he passed on to his children – not a haughty pride, but a knowledge that what you have to contribute is valuable – that you as a person are significant.  I believe we are still honing this to the level which he enjoyed. 

He was always sensitive and gentle with mom. I can remember them kissing one another goodbye in the mornings when dad took us to school, and I was always struck by the tenderness and love that they shared. They have been together for more than thirty seven years, and were still very much in love, walking hand in hand, caring for one another, being patient and forgiving. I know that they have had a very real impact on couples here at Northcliff. This has been a great privilege, even though I know my mum balks at the thought of having been an example, she is gracious enough to acknowledge it.  My mom honoured my father and my father always respected my mom.  I can see this fundamental notion in action everyday between my sister and Keith and I hope that I will one day live up to the example which mom and Dad set. 

Spiritually he led our family in a practical manner. As I've already said, he led by example, and not with lengthy speeches on good behaviour or moral rectitude. He just got on with living as best he could. Don't get me wrong – Dad wasn't without his faults or vices. He was a sinner just like you and me, but he walked humbly with his God, and sought knowledge and wisdom before status and social standing. We always said grace before a meal, and we were 100% aware that everything we had came from God's hand.  I know that his spiritual brothers here at Northcliff meant a great deal to him, guiding him and supporting him through the last thirty-five years. 

Dad was the best husband and father you could have wished for.  He loved rugby, except when a professional team were playing like amateurs.  He enjoyed the company of friends and family around a good South African braai.  He would fish when we were on holiday and on many occasions stood on a beach in the howling wind and driving rain while watching me thrash it out in the waves on a windsurfer or paddleski. Dad was patient and kind, Dad would listen and only give you counsel if you asked or if he thought it was really important, Dad was adventurous and willing to try most things and Dad was an even-keeled captain who steered us all in the right direction avoiding the important lessons in life only if he really had to. 

Dad loved us one and all, each in his own unique way and we will mourn his passing and miss him as each day goes on.  

 

Tribute from Mom 

My gratitude goes to the Lord for sending me Dave.  He loved me in a very special way and we took this journey through life together with much joy, love and friendship and loyalty.  We raised our little family and then Keith married our Ruth, we are so proud of our three children, the people they are and their achievements.  They are much loved and a source of great joy and much comfort. After thirty nine years at AAC Dave retired.  We were so proud of him in 2002  - sitting his exams and passing the ICDL so well to become the accredited computer teacher at North West Christian School.  His pupils had a special place in his heart as did all the teachers and staff there.  The pupils tributes are such outstanding evidence of a mutual affection between them.  

Dave walked with the Lord from a young age, recommitting his life under Rev. Higley in about 1969.  Lead a scout group in Florida in the 1980's.  The church family was specially close to his heart and he was so committed to serving on the Council and had a genuine fondness for his sometimes quirky co-councillors.   

The Lekker-braai saints who speak in tongs have lost a founding member and he will be fondly remembered.  Our Morgan Bay friends became family over 19 years of holidays.  God bless you one and all, our family, our dear friends, our church family, NWCS, from Bastiaan to Dave's youngest pupil, Tuesday night group with Hugh McKelvey and our blessed home-cell group with the Lombards. 

He was a quiet, strong and loving man with a twinkle in his eye.

 

Dad, we loved you, love you and will always love you and, like uncle Sam, Bo, Granny and Grandpa, we will never forget you for it was through you and mom that we are who we are today.

©The Garratt Family (2005)